In teaching 2-3-4 year old kids, parents are very discipline in teaching their toddlers to say “thank you” and “please”. It is an important lesson to be taught and an important lesson to be learned. However, that all seems to drop somewhere in grade school. Parents are saying “do it because I am your parent and I say so” - not many say “will you please do this for me?” The “thank you” seems to disappear as well. Members of a family think things should be done for them without be very nice to each other.
So…parents…throw your kids a curve by saying “thank you” and “please” when they deserve it…it may confuse them and wouldn’t that be fun? Being nice to each other in a family is just another way of showing respect.
The kids have to decide what friends they are going to play with during recess; what to eat in the cafeteria since mom doesn’t sit the food in front of them; how much attention they pay to their teacher(s); if they obey the school rules, etc. Our new “branded” generation the “Tweens” (ages 8-12) are making decisions about the “click” of friends they are going to hang around and many other decisions.
The radio is OK. Contrary to what many so-called experts recommend, actual studies have shown that having the radio on a child’s or teenager’s favorite music station can actually help him learn better.
Set fixed hours. There should be a set schedule for homework. This way, the youngsters can arrange their schedules and make sure they get their homework done every day. It’s also a great way for answering those comments. “I’ll do it later, after I’ve finished whatever,” which is a standard line among kids when asked if they’ve finished their homework. You may want to set a standard time for supper and family discussions, followed by study time. If the student doesn’t have other commitments and gets home reasonably early from school, some homework can be done before supper.
You’r kid will hate you for doing this. I remember Caroll O’Conner who played Archie Bucker for years said to the media and to parents when he lost his grown-up son to drugs: “Get in the face of your kids and protect them no matter what you have to do”.
At this age you may ask can a parent make a change in the decisions their kids are making without them? You won’t like the answer to this question–the answer is “maybe yes” and “maybe no”. It all depends on the communication you have built with your kid the first ten years of their lives. Asking for help is a strength, not a weakness, parents need to seek professional help in this area if you are concerned about the decisions your kids are making on their own.
Resource Author Francisco R. Higueras
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