Swaygirl27 asked:
My step daughter is 5 and like all young kids do, when she plays…she feels the need to take out 99 things and then leave them everywhere. I am constantly walking around bending over and collecting things and putting them back. I’ve tried to have her clean up after herself but havn’t really enforced it because I’m not sure if a 5 year old would understand the concept well enough. Is she old enough to clean up after herself?
Wow, don’t I feel like an idiot now. :-\ I wasn’t around her til she was 4 and she was very baby-ish then…since then she’s become a lot more “mature”…but the cleaning up thing just isn’t taking - I just didn’t know if she was too young to start correcting her about it since she still kind of has the ‘baby’ mind set. She aces her schoolwork yet is afraid of wiping and flushing.. hehe. Well I know what I have to work on. Thanks everyone..
Isidro
My step daughter is 5 and like all young kids do, when she plays…she feels the need to take out 99 things and then leave them everywhere. I am constantly walking around bending over and collecting things and putting them back. I’ve tried to have her clean up after herself but havn’t really enforced it because I’m not sure if a 5 year old would understand the concept well enough. Is she old enough to clean up after herself?
Wow, don’t I feel like an idiot now. :-\ I wasn’t around her til she was 4 and she was very baby-ish then…since then she’s become a lot more “mature”…but the cleaning up thing just isn’t taking - I just didn’t know if she was too young to start correcting her about it since she still kind of has the ‘baby’ mind set. She aces her schoolwork yet is afraid of wiping and flushing.. hehe. Well I know what I have to work on. Thanks everyone..
Isidro
April 25th, 2008 - 6:37 pm
four. maske it clear to her thast if she doesnt pick up her toys she will not be able to play with them
April 27th, 2008 - 10:49 pm
My neice is 2 years and 8 months. as soon as she was old enough (i think 1 and a half) to take out toys, we have taught her to put them back. She now cleans up after herself and helps clean up the toys that her 7 mo old twin brother and sister throw around.
April 28th, 2008 - 7:18 pm
yes…i think that the younger u start w/ them the faster they learn…u might hav 2 bribe her at first or threaten 2 take away things or not let her go 2 the next item if she doesnt pick up her stuff
May 3rd, 2008 - 10:49 am
Of course she is i work in a day care and my two year old clean up i think she is too old for her not to do it and by her taking alot of toys out its not right when you see her doing that tell her that she wont be able to take another toy out until she puts away the one she was using before start now
May 4th, 2008 - 11:29 pm
five is old enough. she won’t have the organizational skills down to clean an entire room at that age, but she can throw toys in a toy box. she also needs to learn to take out one thing at a time and put it away before she gets something else out. when every toy they own is on the floor, it is too overwhelming for them to clean up.
May 6th, 2008 - 10:28 am
She most certainly is! My 19 month old has been picking up her toys since January. We just tell her ” Rose, pick up your toys and put them away”, and she does. If an 19 month old (who has been putting her toys away when told since she was 14 months old), can understand and do this, then your step daughter difinitely can!
Just be firm and direct, for the first couple of times, tell her , “pick up your toys and put them away”, and help her. Then when she gets the hang of it, she will be able to do it all by herself! Reward her for a job well done (don’t bribe by any means), but when she finishes, say “You did such a good job picking up your toys! Won’t Daddy be proud when I tell him!”. Good luck!
May 6th, 2008 - 6:11 pm
my daughter is 3 and has been helping me tidy up as soon as she was old enough to start getting everything out - from about 18 months old.
it’s a valuable opportunity to do sorting and organising and to learn about looking after your possessions.
the sooner you do things like this and make it part of genmeral routine, the easier it is to ‘enforce’ it as it becomes natural.
May 9th, 2008 - 11:13 pm
My kids were 3 when they started picking up behind themselves. Trust me at the age of 5 she understands the concept. She is old enough to know that if she plays with the toys its up to her to pick up behind herself. Try this, tell her if she don’t pick up the toys you will throw them out. After throwing out a few of my son’s toys they got the point…
May 10th, 2008 - 5:52 pm
Oh, yeah - she’s old enough. As soon as they are mobile enough to take out toys and play with them - about 2. You have to stand, and tell them what to do or remind them, “don’t forget that..” and maybe help a little, but they can do it. Then, it should get to the point they can do it on their own by about 4 or 5. Then, it is, “If you want to do that, you must get all your toys back in the box.”, or wherever they go.
Your child is 5 - start the training. Within a few months to a year, you should get her to the point of doing it upon “command”. Then, there is the other edge of the sword - if she does not pick up or refuses to, whatever is on the floor goes away for a while - at least a week. Repeat offense could result in permanent removal of toys. She should learn that if she does not take care of her stuff or respect her parents, she loses privlileges.
May 13th, 2008 - 1:02 pm
i think she is. i always got mad at my parents when they suddenly started picking on me cause i left my toys around. if you can teach her sooner rather than later than she won’t think your spazing at her when you do start to enforce it. but if you aren’t going to enforce that she is to pick up after herself, than don’t bother telling her. you don’t want her to think its ok for her to disobey you.
May 14th, 2008 - 2:53 am
She’s old enough to understand. My little sister is 3 years old and hasnt spoke a word out of her mouth yet due to shyness. But she knows how to pick up things well and clean up after her self and throw things in the garbage. We never taught hr this at home. She had to been taught that at school. So maybe put her in a class if she already isnt . and if se is already then just try teaching her at home. Keep demonstrating to her and trying to make her do it alo . You may get tired of it but it will work eventually. You always have to have patience with children. Wish you good luck with your stepdaughter. = ]
May 14th, 2008 - 10:09 am
From the time they can understand you when you are talking to them. My son has been picking up his toys since he was 18 months old. Granted I helped a little, but that is the age we started at and it really stuck. You have to teach them to help when they are actually willing to.
May 14th, 2008 - 2:22 pm
Oh my. My children have been picking up after themselves since about the time they were able to walk. What I mean by that is…..they drag out the toys, we need to pick them up. I started out by helping them. By the time they were 3 it was a well known rule. Maybe a little strict, but I guarantee you that your step daugher will have to pick up her own toys in kindergarten. It is something that should have been started years ago. I think it teaches them a lot.
May 16th, 2008 - 11:25 pm
With my oldest son who is 6 now I like you didn’t know when was a good age to start him on cleaning up after himself because I wasn’t sure he would understand as well and in a way I thought I would be taking away his childhood to early if I filled it with responsibilities. But as the years went by it got harder and harder to clean up after him because he learned that I would so he was even messier, knowing that Mommy would clean up the mess. So when my youngest son was born he’s 2 1/2 I started him as soon as he was old enough to take the toys out and walk. Now my little one cleans all the time his room gets messy but as soos as I say lets clean your room he starts putting toys back in the toy box, when he changes he puts his dirty clothes in the hamper and he actually enjoys helping me clean up around the house. My aldest son hates the whole idea and I have to fight with him for hours to get his room clean. I think it’s best to start teaching them how to clean up after themselves as soon as they start learning to make a mess. If you start early it with become almost like muscle memory they will know they have to clean their room or pick up the toys in the living room so it wont seem like such a chore just something that has to be done. I have tried it both ways and with my next one I will start enforcing it early.
May 18th, 2008 - 8:48 pm
This should have started much earlier than five in my opinion - if she can fetch the toys out she can put them back (or lose them if it was me - which it isn’t I know but there’s my advice to be taken or left as usual!)
May 20th, 2008 - 6:25 am
Ummmm, my 2 yr. old daughter cleans up her toys!!! I know a 5 yr. old can and should! Start enforcing now. First, to make it easier for her, I would go buy buckets to sort the toys in. When it is time to clean up, so that it is not so over whelming for her, ask her to first pick up the blocks, then pick up all the dishes, and so on. That way they know where to start and they won’t think that they can’t do it. I also have a 7 yr. old boy and a 5 yr. old boy. My 5 yr. old also likes to play with all his toys at once and when it is time to clean up, he gets upset until I tell him what to pick up first, then when he is done with that, I give him another thing to pick up and we keep that up until all is picked up. Organization helps also. I know that step-parenting can be difficult but be sure your husband lets his daughter know that she is to follow all rules even when you are the only one home.
May 22nd, 2008 - 12:56 am
Are you kidding? A 5 year old not old enough to understand the “concept” of putting toys in a box? Come on… the kid’s about to start kindergarten. If she can grasp letters, numbers, learning to read, etc. she can figure out she’s supposed to put her toys away.
My 2 year old puts his away. He makes a game out of it and sings a song.
May 23rd, 2008 - 2:07 am
Kids can start picking up their toys at 18 months. This kid is certainly old enough. If you are in charge of caring for her set up some rules, and set up the discipline necessary for follow through.
May 25th, 2008 - 8:39 am
My girls have been cleaning up after themselves since they were about 18 months old. When they were little they helped me pick up and even learned a song at preschool about “clean up, clean up everybody do your share” that they still sing when cleaning up. When they learned to take their clothes off I taught them to go put them in the dirty clothes hamper. I still have to remind them to clean their room (my oldest will be 6 in august and my youngest is 4) But they do the picking up and I vaccuum for them. My oldest also helps do dishes. She puts the plates and bowls in the dish drainer. I figured the best thing to do was start while they are young and they will know it is expected of them and we wont be fighting over it as teenagers. I am their mother. My job is to teach them and help them through life. I am NOT their servant. My job is not to clean up after them/
May 27th, 2008 - 8:15 pm
start early! Help at first so its not a total shock– that she’s never had to before and suddenly the rules have changed! Get larger containers and bins and label them with words and pictures so she knows where her toys go. Another concept we use at daycare is 2 toys at a time and it stays in the center it came from. You can have a doll and a buggy but if you want to play with cars you better put up your house center toys. Also you could try setting a kitchen timer and having a race to see who can pick up more toys. My mom used to race her day care kids– we’d all try to pick up our toys before she finished lunch, and she’d have a surprise for us ( a video at rest time, or fruit cups for dessert) Good luck!
May 29th, 2008 - 10:52 pm
If they’re old enough to take toys out of the box, then they are old enough to put them back in. My kids started before they were 2. They actually liked to help clean up.
June 1st, 2008 - 3:18 pm
even an 18 month old can pick up some of their own toys!
June 4th, 2008 - 1:16 am
As soon as they learn to walk. Don’t let them get new toys out until they put the old ones up.
June 5th, 2008 - 3:16 am
Yes, at this age your step daughter understands
the concept very well. A good ideal, would be
to clean up with her, this could be for a couple
of days. When you are working with your step
daughter make sure your are explaining how
cleaning up should be done.
June 5th, 2008 - 5:01 pm
my twins are 2 yrs old and they started at 1 1/2. In are house its called tidy up time and thats when all the toys get cleaned up before we do anything else. I think its better if they start young.